crème de la crème

We see this in movies, we read it in novels and yes, all of us feel it so many times. We play a single reel - time and again in our heads: extra's change but lead never changes; never changes the theme. We repeat the same dialogs so many times, we re-do the same sequence ever and ever, and we get assured - nothing can go wrong now. When time comes - I'll do it, I'll do it to hilt, to perfection; this would be my masterpiece!. And then, comes the dooms day, and nothing happens the way it was supposed to be. All characters,all dialogs, all close-ups turn out to be out of place. Yet, the lead is still the same, plot is still the same - just an anti-climax!!

I had thought so many times how I'll write my first article; it would be a beautiful, poetic article, thoughtful, emotional , full of life, love, with my heart into it, - no my soul into it; and I kept looking for it. There were times when I was so close to a wonderful idea, but then - "no it is still not that beautiful, not that enchanting, I'll do better, I can do better, it will happen, it will happen soon" - it never did! And I've already completed my first blog : emotions yes - but where is poetry; full of weird logic and arguments - but where is soul; lot of anger, anguish - but where is love, where is life?!

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Not really sure how did I land up to to that discussion. But I did. Common debate among Indian educated elite : "IITians vs Others" and then among IITians - "'fatkas' the super-humans!"

When I read the article and comments of "super intelligent" IITians, I couldn't hold on and all this just came out. Have a taste your-self.

Prologue: JEE no doubt is the highly competitive and a really-really tough entrance exam. Those who clear it definitely can solve +2 Physics, Maths and Chemistry numericals much faster than others. Point is, are all these guys (and some girls!) inherently genius, born brilliants - truth is, yes few of them are; but many of them are not. Lets admit though- all, yes---- ALL, of them have worked really hard in pre-JEE period. What we are forgetting is: they (well almost all of them) had access to resources and guidance which others don't - best schools in vicinity, every book needed to be consulted, as many tuition classes as one can attend in 24 hrs, and finally, special and very-very expensive coaching classes. Armed with this privileged arsenal, these guys, who definitely are good at studies, cracked JEE and now are regarded as 'crème de la crème'. This is not the complete truth though ,because this would mean that "brilliants can only be born to wealthy parents; and can only come from English-medium schools".

Flashback: Time for a history lesson - as usual a long one. First thing first, let me set my identity clear; I'm doing M Tech from IITD ). I did well at school - of-course a Hindi medium school from rural India with no tuitions at all. Then got into a government institution for +1,+2 non-medical science, with a dream to be a scientist! Would you believe that I didn't even know that there existed 'things' like IITs - (heavens on earth that turn mortals to GODs and you've to cross the holy road of JEE to be the revered one); had a real hard time switching to English medium, all this while trying to spend as little money as I could on any tuition(s); flourished in Physics, but there was hardly anyone to answer my endless question; was really surprised that there were people (of genius breed, of-course) who understood not even an iota of Calculus, Probability (and like), but could do almost any sum from any book (and entrance exams). I got estranged by Maths- which used to be my favorite subject earlier, and realized there is no way I would become a scientist. Applied for two entrance exams : CEET -Common Engg Entrance Test and DCE Delhi, under General category (doomed elite!) . Equipped with a single and affordable tuition and no special expensive coaching, I cleared both of them: just short of being good enough to fetch Comp Sc at DCE and RECs (today's NITs) . Moreover, I didn't want anything else - IT boom - remember?, so settled for a private institute under a "Free seat", which existed in those days.

BE was a terrible experience, good infrastructure and labs but unfortunately no one to answer my questions here as well. So, bunked ALL the classes (attendance short - all 8 semesters!) still managed to earn respect of fellow students and also managed on-campus recruitment in a small company (only one that appeared for the purpose). Five years, 3 companies, a Team Lead designation, thousands of lines of C code (and a healthy bank balance) later, I realized that all this is phony. Every time someone praised my abilities I felt more and more remorseful, for - "I knew that I didn't know" what a graduate, a BE - CS should know. So, applied for GATE and this time I had money (a lot of it for my purpose). Attended week-end coaching classes, took 15 days off before GATE and with some luck with interviews, got admission invitation from IITD. Happily quit a 7+ l.p.a. job (with earlier offers much above that) and with it quit an "easy" life-style, to land up at my dreamland. In heaven and not dead!.

Hazy Days - Reality Bites: Very first lecture and I realized what I had been missing before. Profs were superb (from some other world may be), every single sentence was worth months of study before. More I heard them, much more I wanted to hear. Each Prof is master of not just of his subject but everything that surrounds it. Most assignments were more challenging than my professional duties of five years. Students were enthusiastic and knowledgeable (most of class/course-mates being 'matkas' and a few well groomed B Techs - 'fatkas', with almost 4 years of IIT superiority behind them.). Almost every single student was a deserving candidate. Though, some of them (1 or 2, never more than 5) in each course were exceptionally superb and these are equally represented by UG anb PG students. Lets not forget that all (well, almost) PG students have been to "under-privileged, 2nd class" institutions (like me) all their life so far, with no one to answer their queries while the UGs, for almost 4 years now, have been in one of the most reputed institute (not just in India and Asia but of whole world!) .

I'm not saying that UGs got into IITs by luck, no one does, they have cleared the most competitive exam in world. They have devoted their priceless adolescent years to PCM books, have put in so much time in solving myriad problems to be where they are. But, does it mean, they have got the license to insult every else of homo-sapiens on earth. There are equally or some even more talented people who couldn't be 'proud fatkas'. Also, pride should not reflect as arrogance but as soberness. Most of my PG friends at IIT who appeared for JEE (not cowards like me - who gave up even without a fight) - CRACKED it. They could have been admitted to "less popular" IITs in non-CS/EE branches, but they decided not to "compromise". Add to this the kind of resource/facilities they had at there disposal. For many no extra coaching, almost no tuitions, "normal" schools and foreign to English (which makes one foreign in our country now a days!). Now, that they are here and whenever have a chance to compete with distinguished - made out - fatkas, you don't see a difference!

Afterthoughts: When I joined IIT, my aim was to learn what I think I had missed: most basic knowledge to call one a science/engg graduate . IITs no doubt attract and produce the best of them, so IITians are supposed to have that much basic knowledge. And lo and behold! This is not the case!!. Even here, even at IITs, most (even 'fatkas', and others) don't know -what exactly is Calculus about, what exactly is a Matrix and where does it come from, what is there in Boolean Algebra which makes us solve all problems with computers. (By the way - it was a 'PG' - Claude Shanon - who proved and proposed this in his MS thesis). Of-course all of them (UG + PG) know and use all calculus formulae, Matrix and probability equations, Boolean algebra tricks etc etc. Even more dreadful fact is, they are not even interested in exploring these questions. So, I again felt cheated, much less though, this time at IIT (the heaven!). So I got back to my original love - basic sciences. Wiki, old history books, discussions etc etc.

When people say, that 'PG' only 'mug-up' lectures, well lets put it this way. Yes, I don't participate in Dramas., but I read so much of literature, current-affairs, basic sciences, fiction and then we discuss all these with lot of enthusiasm. I know I'm not a born genius - like all 'fatkas', but an average student with lot of zeal for studies, knowledge. Despite all this I'm still doing well at IIT by "their" standards and rules (strange, here also it means marks - though its called - CGPA/SGPA).

Conclusion (confusions?):

- UGs are worthy students who have been suitably awarded for their hard-work and in some cases genuine talent.

- There are many many more equally worthy of this title "fatka", who are left out because they are under-prepared,unequipped for a brutal,fierce fight - JEE. (PS: I doubt if I belong to this category).

- PGs are those who really want to learn ( well, most I know are). They are not here merely to have a certificate of "brilliance". Most from not-so privileged backgrounds.

- At IITs we've best faculty (even by international standards), but still there is little facination for original thought and even less love for most basic science. All this due to our over-romanticism for Dollars (yes, Rs is for poor and illiterate non-IITians, we deserve Dollars!).

There is so much I can write about this endless debate, but this must already have bored you ,the reader, if you dared to do so - I appreciate your company (and patience, salute you!). Take a break and so shall I (may be more than a break I need a rehabilitation center!)

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This is not what I have been waiting for, longing for! Not poetic, not beautiful. It's a beginning though, beginning of a long - long journey and I'll pick best flowers to adorn it. See you later!