Lights! Camera!! [aur] .................... Blackout!!!

Disclaimer: All characters appearing in this work are real. Any resemblance to places, persons - living or dead, is purely intentional.

Scene 2 [reality cinema - no takes]: Being in no mood to think creatively; it had to be some brilliant art-work to draw a recluse me even to comment, leave out writing a blog (that demands some sort of passion). It was meant to be just routine "see it, forget it" exercise. Few initial frames, and it's clear - there is more to it than what look on the surface - could be better than ordinary, may be much worse, but definitely not 'run of the mill' Bollywood piece. It took no serious effort on my part to direct my 'not present' heart & mind (lungs, liver or whatever it takes), since I couldn't figure out when I got so deeply immersed into it. Frame after frame it left me jolted; by the time it finished ( or did it, actually?), I feel like one of the characters (off screen, of-course): shredded! Literally awed!! Completely dumb-struck!!! [ may be I don't have correct phrase to put here]. Sleep angels [devils] are no where on the anvil. It is 4:30 in AM.

Scene 1 [plot build-up]: For days now, I've lost my self [again!]; doing nothing; but no time, or mental state, for synthesis optimization or FPGA design, not even for my personal favorite science history, mathematics or popular fiction. FIFA,10 is of no help either, I'm no soccer fan(atic) anyways. Speaking to friends or family can do no good either, don't know what to talk about, rather there is good probability that I'll upset them as well. Just surfing aimlessly through sea of Internet in search of a deserted island where I could bury my head in beach sand and forget everything else. [Don't feel intimidated please. For, those who know me, already know, there is nothing new into it; I constantly and frequently set myself to this 'self-destruction mode' and have survived so-far. Hope the trend continues]. In a desperate attempt, I turn to my favorite collection of Hollywood classics. These are engagingas always but for some reasons, completely unknown to me, the gloom, 'withdrawn mental state' proves to be too much overpowering. As a last resort, I check out for Bollywood 'masala' world. Start with a much hyped, power struck flick and contrary to my expectations [or may be exactly as per my expectations] it was mostly a waste of time, such a waste of money! I've tried everything, no where else to go now, gloomy gets gloomier!

Usually everything (well, almost!) I watch follows a serious and sincere recommendation from a select group of friends who definitely know what they are talking about. So, here I am, with no special recommendation, and definitely not a word about this one. Weird name it has, censor board has already played its 'rightful' role in sensationalizing it and I hate cheap publicity! 'Love, S** aur Dhoka' - LSD!! What could somebody expect from such a title: a cheap mix of bedroom scenes, some utter nonsense exposing songs, and thats it! Its well past 2:00 in the morning, 24 Hr Lipton service is no more in operation, Youth-cafe would definitely be closed at his Hr and there is only a faintest, if any, chance that Library-Nescafe outlet would not be closed. No-one to talk, no-where to go and now, not even a God-damn coffee! Hell with such a life!! I decide, with no choice anyways, to give LSD a try: re-assuring myself - Dibankar 's got some unique talent, an out-of-line director quite unlike other Bollywood bigwigs. A silent hostel room, [of] a desolate early morning campus, [with] a forsaken PG (post-grad) soul in it, and a Bollywood flick with a strange name and bad publicity; you hardly expect anything exciting. Few clicks, some common shortcuts, 2 crushed pillows and an ominously lit laptop screen in a dark room looms large over everything else. Its 3:00 now.

Scene 3: The credits start to roll but I've neither energy, nor willingness, left in me to close the window. Even when the video self-closes itself, I don't seem to get over it. Almost 5:00 it is, I can hear birds chirping, there is no way I'll be able to sleep, even if I try my best. Set for a long circuitous morning walk, with no health benefits in mind, I can see avid joggers, rare breed of Prof's whose mere presence makes you feel small; but today I don't seem to feel anything and end up being indulged in hypothetical conversations, playing part of a movie not shot. Back at room, I start the movie all over again, this time I know all dubious shades of characters even before they reveal themselves; I knew all twists and turns; but still to my surprise every dialog has a different meaning this time. What I felt was just a stupid, unnecessary scene in the first viewing seems to make perfect sense now. This even allows me to beat my regular routine of missing breakfast. Mind is still buzzing with random thoughts ;but full stomach and more than 24 Hrs (even more) of emotional drainage start to take the toll on not-so-healthy body. Eyes close and breathing gets heavier, and I loose sense of time and place. I don't know what time it is.

Scene 4: I must be dreaming, or may be half -awake, when seldom-bolted door of room creaks a little. A dim face peeps slowly and says something, I don't seem to make out exactly but may be it said - "lunch?". I try to open my lips but nothing comes out but just a hiss. No more words, face disappears slowly and door creaks a little again. Dream it must be. Time - Does any such thing even exist?!.

Scene 5: Head feels heavy and body warm, I grope around and pick up my cellphone; with half-closed eyes I try to look at bright screen. Damn! it's past 4:00 in the PM. Mind is blank now, body resists every movement I try to make, I can feel last night's (night?) hangover and a cup of HMT (hand-made-tea) will definitely do some good. Another circuitous walk, a small one by Hostel area and I realize something has changed. Rather more-than-something has changed for sure, something energetic, something fresh. I don't feel bogged up by 'suicidal tendencies'. No more brooding, no more solitude, not for now at least. I send a friendly [not-my-type] sms to friends, they must get to know I'm alive, I'm 'OK'! Does anybody care though, may be some of them do, I know they do. Laptop gets its deserving place [lap] and fingers theirs [typing]. I'm writing - it definitely must be a good time, a very good time it is!!

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Statutory Warning: LSD is no nonsense movie. I won't say you all will like it the way I did. One thing I can guarantee though, you may not have seen such a bold treatment of such taboo, yet real subject(s), and definitely not in such a wonderful and creative manner, uncharacteristic to Bollywood trend. Some words of warning are in place at this time: It's an utterly disturbing movie and a definite no-no for faint-hearted; for it shows the truth, and truth is bitter, truth is ugly. As the title may incorrectly suggest (as I had my apprehensions before) , there is no cheap exposing in the movie. One scene that has been so poorly hyped about doesn't last even for few seconds and it's blurred. I don't understand why, there is nothing in that scene which we don't have access to in our 'popular, creative' prime time; and I'm not even talking about ever-present-on-TV video albums or 'super-star' E. H. movies. This scene is defining moment of a nerve cracking story and you when it happens you feel like crying rather than feeling ashamed of it. I connected straightway to the movie and its characters because I happened to have discussion with a good friend regarding one of the key themes. You, too, are bound to connect to yourself at more than one place(s), for, there is not even a single frame where you would say- this is unreal or dramatic.

If you are wondering: everything is so nice then what is so 'taboo' about the movie: it is the theme, the ugly truth! More importantly the dialogs: totally uninhibited!!. No way acceptable in our 'civilized', 'mannered', 'sophisticated' society. Still, If you have been anywhere in north India ( and I don't have much experience of other parts, so can't say), I'm sure you've come across every such [ugly] sentence often, for sure more than once. Such are our ethics! Pathetic!! What Dibankar has done is, he has just put them on celluloid. Crux is - It's no 'happy-go-lucky', 'all-is-well' movie to please your senses. Its a disturbing art-work, a creative piece that shakes you beyond imagination. I'm no expert on cine-art, but those who are, will appreciate it even more. Not at all a 'family movie', you may not want your parents/elders' company when watching this (facing the real, ugly face of our society) and you MUST NOT allow your children to watch this. I'm telling you, there innocent, uncorrupted minds and soul are not prepared for it (Even though there are no nude scenes!). If you are lucky to have a mature partner though, go ahead and spend some quality time together. You'll have something really creative and of substance to watch, a very rare phenomenon in our film industry.

Since you may not find LSD running on any multiplex (who would dare to show such bitter reality, and for how long), you can get it from moserbaer. While you enjoy this rare art-work, I urgently need to get back to my books: I need them more than they need me. See you later! Love!!